the birth of amira Danyelle
3/11/24: On Monday morning I woke up around 5am feeling pretty uncomfortable. I had been getting up around this time every day for a few days just simply because I was unable to sleep. I decided to get started on some work while the rest of the house was sleeping. Andrew, my husband, got up about an hour later to get ready for work. He asked me the same question he had been asking for days, “How ya feeling, Mommy?” My response was pretty similar to the one I had been giving, “Not great, but the same as I have been.”
My husband left for work and I continued to do some work. About the time he made it to his office, I started noticing that my once irregular contractions were starting to feel pretty rhythmic. At this point in the week I was 37w6d so I was very much convinced that there was no way this meant anything, especially since my last birth was a 41w2d experience. I texted Andrew to let him know that they were feeling really regular and that I was starting to think that if they increased in intensity at all it would be baby time. I contemplated continuing into my work day or if I should try to get into my chiropractor. After talking it over with my husband, we decided it was best if I stayed home to relax and tried to get into my chiropractor. I was very uncomfortable and that just continued to become more and more the case. Since my daughter had not yet woken up, I decided I should try to nap just in case this turned into anything.
My mother and husband woke me up with their texting to check on me. I let them know that nothing had changed and I was just trying to get any rest I could. Before I knew it my mother was on my front step to drive me to my chiropractor (which is 50 minutes away.)
My chiropractor visit did my hips so much good. I could immediately feel a difference in the way that I felt. I got back in the car and headed home. Mom dropped me off and left my sisters behind to help me out. That afternoon we did a few chores around my house and just spent time together. The more I think on it the more I’m sure they were left to babysit me, not my daughter. Andrew came home from work and never went back that week.
3/12/24: On Tuesday, we visited my chiropractor again and spent some time with our nephew.
3/13/24: Wednesday was another chiropractor visit. We dropped off our toddler with my parents and went out to dinner together (for the last time). Chocolate covered cashews were calling my name so we also made a trip to Kroger. At my doula’s request, we spent thirty minutes curb walking. I was so exhausted and sore after that experience that I resolved in my heart to never let anyone convince me to do it again. I haven’t changed my mind either. After picking up our toddler, I chose to do the miles circuit once again but without the curb walking.
3/14/24: Thursday came and went pretty uneventfully. We saw my chiropractor for the fourth time and took a few walks with our toddler. Thursday night was a big thunderstorm and I wondered if the pressure change would cause anything to happen. I woke up early again on Friday still pregnant (and secretly wishing this baby would hang on a few more weeks.)
3/15/24: Friday morning we got up and took my toddler to my sisters for a playdate. I had my 38 week prenatal at the birth center so we headed that direction wondering if it would be the last visit. My contractions had stayed consistently 12 minutes apart since Monday. Some contractions were strong enough to get my attention and convince me into funny looking positions. I found myself squatting and holding onto things more and more as the week progressed. I let the midwife know about how my week was going. She reminded me to prepare my mindset to continue pregnancy for a few more weeks. I left knowing that I wouldn’t still be pregnant at my 39 week appointment. I didn’t want to give birth that early but I knew instinctively that it was happening very soon.
That evening we were able to spend a small amount of time with some friends doing volunteer work. They decided to go out to dinner but I knew I needed to be home. We went home, I showered and my daughter fell asleep. Around 9pm she woke up completely inconsolable. I decided to wrap us up in some blankets and go for a walk in the dark. We walked for a while and rocked on the porch just enjoying the chilly air and our snuggles. Little did I know, this was the last evening it was just the three of us.
Around 10:30pm that night I told Andrew that I wasn’t sure what was going on but something was definitely happening. I encouraged him to go ahead and go to bed just in case we had a baby that night. I was able to lay down and get a little sleep until around 2am when I could no longer just lay still.
Labor had began.
“I left knowing that I wouldn’t still be pregnant at my 39 week appointment.”
My contractions began to increase in intensity. I went into the bathroom and decided to try to get comfortable in a few different positions. Eventually swaying and squatting wasn’t enough to comfort me anymore. I went into our bedroom to ask Andrew if he was awake- he was. I let him know I was going to get into the bath.
As I was getting into the bath, I noticed my contractions were becoming more frequent. I was not ready to start timing them yet as I knew I still had quite a bit of progress to make. Andrew came into the bathroom to sit with me and see how he could help.
He asked me about timing them and I agreed that he should. I was praying they were still 8-10 minutes apart because I really didn’t want to be the person waking everyone up in the middle of the night.
As he timed them he noticed that they were irregular but definitely getting closer together. My body fought to tense up but I consciously reminded myself to surrender to the contractions. My body was doing what it was supposed to do.
Andrew finally told me we weren’t waiting any longer and that we were calling the midwife. Ashley was on call that night and answered the phone. He explained my contraction pattern to her and that I was definitely in labor. She asked me how I was feeling and I let her know that I felt that maybe I was being a little under dramatic about how strong they were. (I definitely wasn’t ready to have a baby yet.) She advised that we head to the birth center since we had such a drive.
Andrew began to call everyone on my birth team.
I got out of the tub and took a moment to really look at my little girl one last time. A few moments later my mom had arrived and met me at the front door. I handed off my only child for the last time.
I decided to not let the car labor experience get the best of me like it did last time. I let myself get lost in social media and the music playing on the radio.
I had a TENS unit for the drive. I chose to use it on a very low setting to combat the intensity of my contractions. I found it provided some relief in those moments my body needed to be moving but couldn’t.
“I got out of the tub and took a moment to really look at my little girl one last time.”
Upon arrival Grayce met us at the car to help us gather anything we needed to take inside. Sarah came over to take my vitals, which were right where they should be. Grayce had water for me and made sure I had everything I could have possibly needed for my laboring.
I started out leaning over the birth ball just breathing through my contractions as everyone got settled. Grayce and Andrew both provided counter pressure on my back during some of the more intense ones.
I’m completely unsure of the timeframe in which it happened- Ashley and Sarah brought in a massage table for Grayce to give me a fascia release. Andrew brought out essential oils that he and Hanna, our photographer, took turns waving around my face for relaxation as my contractions built.
My mom and sisters sat out in the waiting room with my daughter throughout my laboring. I decided I wanted to see my toddler and spend some time with her. I walked out and sat in front of the fire place while she played and acted silly for onlookers. Hearing her giggles and watching her play was exactly what I needed in my laboring at that time. I was able to fade in and out during my contractions all while hearing the happiest little squeals. She kept me grounded.
I finally decided I wanted to go back to the birth suite. I wasn’t back for long before Grayce suggested emptying my bladder. Upon doing so I decided I wanted to try the shower and birth stool. Andrew helped me get into the shower in the position I wanted and even brought me a towel to put around my belly. The intensity of the shower head felt like too much stimulation for my body during contractions and the towel helped to mute that. I changed positions a few times as my body signaled. Grayce sat faithfully by my side changing out cool cloths on my neck and forehead. She made sure I stayed hydrated and even massaged my leg when it fell asleep. She was amazing. Andrew and Grayce switched out a few times and stayed so attentive to my needs. I never lacked a single thing.
I moved to the tub and invited my mom to bring in Avery. I loved getting to see her sweet little face as I worked to bring her sister into the world. She brought a little comedic relief to the room and kept the energy up. My mom brought her over to the edge of the tub to see me, but she wasn’t super interested. She was still just what I needed. After a bit she went back to the waiting area and I kept working to labor my baby closer to meeting us.
Grayce and Hanna kept me going through the next little bit by talking and laughing with me. It was like hanging out with my friends. It was easy to just labor through with my friends distracting me.
Grayce, Hanna, and Andrew took turns bringing me water and changing out my cold towels. My contractions continued to increase in intensity but I stayed determined to be present of mind for as much as I could.
After a few that seemed to last forever, Grayce convinced me to try to empty my bladder again. I agreed and immediately went through transition. I had several contractions back to back that were incredibly intense and didn’t let up. Andrew performed counter pressure, which gave some slight relief. I went back to the birth tub.
After laboring for a little longer, I was feeling the urge to push. I wanted to fight the urge until my body took over and did it for me. Andrew came to the edge of the tub to hold my hand as my body took over and pushed. I pushed a few times and really fought it each time, almost upset that it was happening. Grayce left the room to tell Jenni I began pushing. She came in along with Jamie just before I burst into tears. I wasn’t crying because of pain but because everything was happening so fast. I wanted to still be pregnant. I felt guilty that I wasn’t going to be able to give my undivided attention to Avery anymore. I thought about how confused Avery would be and I didn’t want her to feel replaced or less special. I wasn’t ready to be the mom of two. I wanted to go home and pretend like none of it was happening, but I couldn’t. I had to pull myself together to meet my baby and I had to do it before Avery came in the room.
“I pushed a few times and really fought it each time, almost upset that it was happening.”
After a couple more involuntary pushes Jenni suggested I try pushing on my knees, which is exactly what I had planned to do all along! I got on my knees and quickly realized it wasn’t the position for me. It didn’t matter though because I felt my body give another really hard push and I couldn’t stop it. I told Andrew to get Avery, as I really wanted her there when Amira was born. The next thing I know, my body pushes the hardest it ever has. My water broke in my hand as my daughter’s entire head was born- all in a matter of seconds. I couldn’t believe it. I flipped over in the tub trying to catch my breath when my body pushed again and my entire baby was born. I caught her and brought her to my chest amazed by what I had just done. I looked at my new baby and back at my first baby completely in love. I was officially a girl mama of two under two.
I wanted to wait to cut the cord until I birthed my placenta. I kept feeling the cord and it was still pulsing. Jenni recommended giving me a tincture to help it release in addition to latching Amira. I agreed to the tincture and it released. Delivering my own placenta was another one of my goals and I was able to do just that.
Amira (and my placenta) went right to Andrew in bed for some skin-to-skin as I was helped out of the bath and into bed with them. It was determined I had no need for stitches and just needed to bond with my family. After the four of us snuggled together and got to know our new addition, Amira was weighed. My 6lb baby was just perfect in every way. A few hours later we loaded up and went home for the first time as a family of four.
As detailed as this story was, it still didn’t capture everything I could have told you. I couldn’t even begin to really tell you all that Andrew, Grayce, Hanna, my mom and my sisters did. It doesn’t scratch the surface of what Ashley, Jenni, Jamie or Sarah did. I am so thankful that they all trusted me to trust my body to do exactly what it was created to do. Women are incredible- our bodies create, birth and sustain life.
All thanks and praise goes to Our Creator!
